Everybody is Not Doing It

In the previous blog, you got a glimpse of what it’s like to go from walking in purity to cultivating passion within marriage. Shifting from the mindset of, “Sex is bad, to sex is good” can be a bit of a challenge. Meet Cameron Rice and Faith Manigan, a pre-married couple who share the struggles and strengths of walking in purity. Learn how to set boundaries, resist temptation and deal with those who have negative perceptions of purity.

In a world that says everybody’s doing it, why did you choose not to?

Cam – To honor God and what His Word says. I believe the best way to lead is by example. In order to show people it is possible you have to give them an example to follow. I wanted to be that for people.

What are some boundaries you’ve set to achieve your goal of saving sex for marriage?

Faith- As trivial as some of these things may sound, all of them were absolutely necessary to my success. No communication with the opposite sex after 9pm (nothing good happens after that time lol), modest attire- I have to protect the eye gates of my brothers in Christ, accountability for trips spent together- I needed someone calling me asking me if I’m okay, or if I’m struggling, someone to encourage me and speak life into me.

Is it challenging for you to save sex for marriage?

Cam – I believe challenging is an understatement. As a male I am a physical being and also, the fact that I have been sexually active before makes the temptation worse. I believe 100% when you ask the Holy Spirit to intervene on your temptation and also having a fiance who does a great job of guarding my heart with how she clothes herself and communicates with me.

Do people ever mock, tease, or get jealous of you for walking in purity?

Faith- Unfortunately very often. It’s not the “cool” thing to not kiss your boyfriend/fiancé.

What advice do you have for someone who feels like they messed up and it’s too late for them?

Cam – I believe it is NEVER too late to walk in purity. I had been active for several years and sure it is easy to say there is “no point” but I believe purity is bigger than me. I believe walking in purity is also about the people around you and people closest to you. It is a way of ministry to others and a testament of how important your relationship with Christ is. In order to walk in purity, the best advice I can give someone is to protect your heart and mind which may include leaving friends behind who think purity is stupid or dumb. His Grace is always sufficient enough for any mistake.

Do you think it will be difficult to shift your mindset from “Sex is bad to sex is good.”?

Faith- It’s honestly something I’m walking out right now. Trying to prepare my mind to switch from protecting my body. To understand that my body is soon to be his just as much my own. I keep reminding myself, it’s worship and it’s a privilege!

What is something you would like to say to the person who is feeling pressured to have sex?

Cam – Change your environment. Change your thoughts. I realized early on, one of the main reason for having sex was to impress my “friends.” As a man, sex can turn into a prideful accomplishment, “Yeah I am the man because I am active with several women.” A real man treats one woman with honor, dignity, and respect. The pressure comes from your friends and what they value. Our thoughts are often influenced by our closest friends. So change your circle and get in community with people who are chasing the same goal and value purity just as much as you. You need people to hold you accountable.

Share your favorite book about purity.

Faith- as cliche as it is, The Bible is my favorite book about purity. No better book can tell me who I am and who I’m called to be other than the Bible. Knowing who I am and whose I am encouraged my purity walk. It gave me my standard.

Share your favorite quote about purity.

Cam – If 95% of people are doing it, then it is average. Keep it simple don’t be average.

Share your favorite couple that has walked in purity. (Famous or Friend)

Faith- Julie and Ben Bundren, they’re getting married April 11, 2019! She was my go-to person for questions, accountability, reassurance that we could walk this out correctly, and so much more. Their example helped and encouraged me!

On November 23, 2018, “Black Friday” Cam, surrounded by family and friends, surprised Faith with a romantic proposal in downtown Huntsville’s Big Spring Park. She said “YES!”

Photography by Ron Corn

Connect with Cameron Rice and Faith Manigan on Instagram.

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Real Love

Our oldest daughter recently had the pleasure of attending the 35th Annual Fun-Set Social and Charity Club Beautillion Ball. She was an escort for a friend who was a beau in the ball. The Beautillion season highlights the success of young African American males.  Beaus attend seminars with a focus on spiritual, social, educational and economic growth. The annual Beautillion Ball is a culmination of educational activities and fun.

We were honored for her to be invited, but we were even more excited to get to attend with her. My husband is a hardcore helicopter parent, so having a valid reason to be present was right up his alley. We have a great rapport with the young man who invited her and we’ve been friends with his family for over a decade. But she’s his baby girl, and he delighted in being right by her side. The way my husband assisted our daughter with her dress, watched her on the dance floor and pulled out her chair when she would sit reminded me of so many of the reasons I fell in love with him.

Not only did Trinity look like a princess she was treated like one by both her date and her dad.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Recently someone heard me and my husband’s testimony of secondary virginity and thought it wasn’t “real”. They weren’t implying that it was too fanciful. They were insinuating that it wasn’t “real” like, “BIG DEAL, who cares that you had sex before marriage and chose to practice abstinence while you were pregnant.” And all I could think of was, “God cares.”

Sometimes when people say things like, “I’m just being real.” What they really mean is that they are being “real” carnal. If people can’t receive from you because they don’t perceive you as being “real” don’t compromise your values, lower your standards, or remove healthy boundaries because of their opinion. The truth is, they may have a problem with your testimony because it highlights that God is real. It’s their brokenness that keeps them from celebrating how God’s REAL love has made you whole.

 

 

Real Love

 

He treats me like a princess because I’m a daughter of the King.

There’s no need for me to be stressed because I am his Good Thing.

He’s my Knight in Shining Armor the one who makes me brave.

You might wonder how he does it, it’s all because he’s Saved.

When a man is in love with The Lover of his Soul,

His love won’t leave you broken, it will only make you whole.

He can’t see you as royalty if he doesn’t seek the King.

If he does not honor God he won’t know you are a Queen.

Don’t settle for a boy when you can have a Prince.

Set your standards high and do not straddle the fence.

Boundaries keep you safe, they prevent you from a fall.

Your body is a temple protect the palace walls.

Far above rubies, more precious than silver and gold.

Why settle for lust filled fragments when real love can make you whole?

© Toya Poplar 2016

 

Photography by Tim Gentry

If you want to hear, “Well done thou good and faithful servant.” Keep doing well and stay faithful to God’s Word.

Marriage is our ministry but purity will always be our passion. If you ever need someone to share the message of how powerful purity is, connect with us. We believe that purity empowers you to plan your future without looking back at your past. And we know from experience that it’s never too late to wait.