Who or what influenced you to walk in purity?
For both of us, it was our parents, our upbringings, and our faith that kept us pure. For me, Kaitlin, I was heavily influenced by my parents who had walked through teen pregnancy and wanted to protect me from the same struggles they faced. While their story was one of redemption and grace, they still wanted to see me wait on the husband God had for me.
Was it hard to shift your paradigm from purity to passion?
For Caleb, it hasn’t been hard at all. His transition into passion has been seamless. For me, Kaitlin, on the other hand, it has been very difficult to shake off the shame that was always related to sex in my mind. I have had to really walk and talk with the Lord through understanding the gift of intimacy in marriage. Intimacy with my husband shows me how to be more intimate with my God and visa versa. I am learning to see passion as a present instead of a prison.
What do you feel like were the benefits of saving yourself for marriage?
Caleb – There has been no comparison to previous sexual partners in our marriage, and that has eliminated so much anxiety and stress. We have avoided the shame that often comes with premarital sex and we share the excitement of discovering how to have sex the right way, God’s way.
What advice would you offer couples who are waiting?
Kaitlin – It’s worth it. It really is. Without sharing too much — the moment we lost our virginity, it all made sense. I was so grateful I had waited for the one person who had waited for me. We had nothing to worry about and no previous experience to compare the moment to. There is nothing like sharing that moment of intimacy after you become husband and wife. The wedding vows are great, but God created sex to be the covenant that seals the deal.
What misconceptions do you think people have about couples who save sex for marriage?
Caleb – The major misconception is that people who wait are prudes. It’s not about rules; it’s about a relationship with God and wanting to fully experience what he has for us in marriage.
What was your greatest struggle prior to marriage?
It was very hard to express love without being intimate. It’s especially hard once you’re engaged and you are so close to the finish line! We stumbled and fell plenty of times along the way, but we relied on Jesus to give us the strength to abstain.
What is your greatest challenge now that you are married?
Now that we are married, it is evident the enemy does not want us to have sex.
Caleb – Maintaining passion is difficult. Now that we can have sex every day, it’s difficult for us to be on the same page. As a man, I’m almost always ready to have sex, but it’s not as easy for Kaitlin.
Kaitlin – With the hustle and bustle of life, I struggle to make sex a priority. I often still see it as a sin instead of the lifeline our marriage often needs. I get busy and tired and put it off. I am working to be more intentional about initiating sex and physically showing Caleb how much I love him.
On a scale of 1-10 how much of a priority is intimacy to you? 1 being “not that important,” 10 being “extremely important.”
Intimacy is a 10 for us. We’ve seen it change our marriage in amazing ways.
What are some tools you gained from walking in purity that you now apply in your marriage?
We both learned how to respect one another — respect each others’ bodies, minds, desires, needs, and souls.
What does being “Beautifully Bound” mean to you?
We are beautifully bound together in a covenant with Jesus, through Jesus, and with each other. What God joined together, no man or enemy can ever separate. And we know that to be true in and out of the bedroom.
Connect with Kaitlin Chappell Rogers on her breathtaking blog and be sure to read Caleb’s incredible Letter to Girls Who Are Tired of Waiting. Kaitlin is a speaker, blogger and author of the new ebook Not From God: Taking Back the Narrative of Your Life. Subscribe to her blog, buy her book, and follow her on all social media platforms.
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