1. What is something quirky about me that you love?
Toya- I like that you talk to yourself.
Melvin- I love that you are a black girl who can’t dance.
2. How did you know I was the one?
Toya- I knew you were the one because you loved all the things I didn’t like about myself.
Melvin-I knew you were the one because you weren’t naive and you survived meeting my mom.
3. What song would you say is “our” song? (Old School & New School)
Toya- Old School, It’s Our Anniversary by Tony, Toni, Tone. New School, What Do You Say by Proverbalist.
Melvin- Don’t You Know by Heavy D. New School, My Whole Life Has Changed by Genuine
4. What is your favorite book and why?
Toya-The Bible. It’s the perfect blend of drama and hope.
Melvin- The Bible. It’s always applicable.
5. What is one of the first things I did that made an impression on you?
Toya-You heard me.
Melvin-You gave me your number.
6. What is a goal you have for our marriage?
Toya-I’d like for us to leave a legacy of love in the earth. One that impacts our children’s children. I would love for us to write a book on marriage.
Melvin-I would like to experience more firsts together.
7. What is your absolute favorite memory with me?
Toya- Traveling to Honduras.
Melvin-It’s not a memory, it’s a feeling.
8. What advice would you give to a couple about to get married?
Toya-Pray for, praise, protect and pursue one another.
Melvin-Put your spouse before yourself.
9. Would you rather time travel with me into our past or into our future?
Toya-I would choose to travel to the past, I would like for you to meet my father.
Melvin- I would like to travel to the future to meet our children’s children. To see space travel or find out if we all become zombies.
10. When was the last time we laughed uncontrollably?
Toya-Yesterday. You did an impersonation of Jeff Bridges in The Giver.
Melvin-In Mississippi when our son asked the preacher why he said “Ha!” between every word.
11. Would you rather have more money to spend on me or more time to spend with me?
Toya-I would rather have more time to spend with you.
Melvin-I want more time to spend with you and more money to spend on you because you were with me when I had no money.
12. What has been our greatest trial?
Toya-Adoption.
Melvin-Raising children.
13. What has been our greatest triumph?
Toya-Adoption
Melvin- Being “happily” married.
14. Tell me one thing that I do for you that no one else does? (Outside of the obvious.)
Toya-You listen when I’m hurting until pain leaves and love returns.
Melvin- Give me purpose. Make me feel special.
15. What is the very first thing you thought of me when we first met?
Toya-I thought you were a flirt, I didn’t like your cologne, you were light-skinned…
Melvin-I thought you were a cute girl that I wanted to flirt with.
16. What is my greatest weakness?
Toya- Your rigid paradigms.
Melvin- That you love people so deeply.
17. What is my greatest strength?
Toya- Your ability to compartmentalize.
Melvin- That you love people so deeply.
If you have any questions you would like to add to our list we welcome you to do so in the comment section. To listen to What Do You Say, written by Melvin Poplar Jr. (vocals by Adam Sullivan) click image under question number three. Thanks for taking the time out to help us celebrate our anniversary! We hope you enjoyed this glimpse into our marriage.
Toya & Melvin Poplar
P.S. Don’t be shy, we would love to hear from you. If you are married how many years have you been married, what advice would you offer a couple about to get married?
stopwritethere 
The questions below came in from Carly Ann Lastie via Facebook.
1. What are your favorite things about each other?
Toya- I love Melvin’s mind. He’s brilliant, but super humble.
Melvin- I love watching Toya communicate. It’s truly a gift. I love watching her speak.
2. Are these things the things you fell in love with from the beginning or are they things that have grown over time?
Toya- It was one of the very first things that fascinated me about him. When we met he was 17 but had such an old soul.
Melvin- Yes. I knew she had this gift. She would write plays and speak. I just don’t know if she recognized how special she was.
3. What is your best advice for other couples married and to-be married…
See #8
Love you both so much! We love you too Carly!!! Thanks for these awesome questions!!!
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This was an amazing post! Plan on doing the question/answer with Jay this week:) We have been married 24 years and a piece of advice given to us that we try and remember is not to use the words “always and never” when having hard talks.
“Over-generalizing a moment of strife speaks words of death over married life!”
A moment is a moment and we make momentary mistakes. A life is a lifetime of recovering well from the momentary mess ups, turning muck into memories of rising strong!
Love you sis! You and Melvin give marriage a beautiful reputation!
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Awww. That’s really great, I would love to hear your answers. 24 years of marriage is an amazingly miraculous marriage testimony these days. That’s some really great advice. Always and never can kill any relationship. You and Jay are real such a blessing! True marriage role models, paving the way for others to be inspired to keep fighting the good fight of faith.
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I’ve studied these letters on the keyboard long enough to push past my reservations and write regardless to shame of being exposed… Tears being held back , this post has worked unexpected miracles . It has fostered hope in me of healing and deepening the love of my man and our loveship.. The two of you , your ministry of love , your chemistry … it was one of the most beautifulest things today. GIve thanks for sharing the blessings found in your marriage !! Giving multiplies , expands, and renews…..priceless indeed.
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Dear Sister, thank you for pressing past your reservations and sharing the overflow of your heart. Your words watered me and woo me to write. I am thankful for you, my favorite new wordsmith added to my world. Mercy, peace and love be yours in abundance today and always.
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